Tuesday, February 28, 2012

I'M STANDING UP...

There is an old joke about a little boy at church but I am going to switch to little girl. The mother keeps telling the little girl to sit down on the pew and the child keeps standing up. Finally the mother speaks in her authority and tells the child to sit down. The girl sits down but says, "I may be sitting down on the outside, but I'm standing up on the inside."

Doesn't that sound like most of  us at some point in our lives when we can not have our way and yet we still hold onto what we want in some fashion. I recently had to make the decision for my mother to go into Assisted Living. I had help with my sister and brother concurring and the rehab hospital telling mom she could no longer live alone. She fell in Feb right after my visit from 14-21. Her leg muscles have become weak enough that she can no longer walk and must get around with a wheel chair. I found out she had been falling on a regular basis. but she has strong bones and did not break anything. But one of these times she could have hit her head and be unconscious for days. She has refused to wear a Life Alert button. She has Parkinsons and we believe it has progressed now and affects her leg muscles. She is a strong person, her mind is good for almost 91 and she likes making her own decisions. She THINKS she is going to drive again...hence the joke about the girl "standing up on the inside".

Bill and I flew down the next day after her fall. He stayed a week but had to get back to MN because the neighbors were caring for the three cats and we did not want to impose any longer. I stayed 5 weeks; Bill took the cats to WI and our son took care of them while Bill came down again for a couple of weeks. During this time mom was in a rehab hospital and I was researching the Assisted Living facilities in the area. I picked a small one that only has about 50 residents. I thought it would be easier for mom to get to know people. Her room is not too far from the dining room and she can almost get there herself in her wheel chair. She is still having therapy, and they monitor her meds, take her to doctors appointments and such. It has been almost three months and she has adjusted to her new living arrangements pretty well. She doesn't like some things, but her basic needs are met and she is safe. She still insists on going to the bathroom alone and NOT calling for help (more of the stubborn little girl showing).

We then came home for a month and needing to clean her house out so the painters could work and get the house ready to sell, we had to make plans to return to TX. We did not want to put the cats through the stress of being boarded or the expense. We decided to rent a 26 ft RV and drive down. Bill did all the driving and as soon as we were there we started the task off emptying cabinets and such. Beth came from  TN to help for 5 days or we would not have been able to finish. But the job is done, the house is freshly painted inside and out, and we even had them put in a wood laminate floor in the great room/kitchen area and down the hall.That was finished this week and next week the carpet cleaners come to clean the bedroom carpets and the indoor/outdoor carpet in the little office.. Then the cleaning ladies come next Thursday and do windows and make it look nice everywhere. Hopefully a buyer will see the nice improvements and not notice the small imperfections. The house is 25 years old and needs lots of TLC but it is a solid house in a good neighborhood and houses are selling in TX.

Mom has now been in assisted living for 1 1/2 years and doing as well as could be expected. she has to use a wheel chair to get around, falls occasionally and is in a safe environment. She will be 92 next year.Her house sold within a week of being on the market. Must have done something right.

This is an old post that remained a draft for over a year. Not sure where it will land in the lineup but it has a date and maybe you can line them up when you read them for sequential continuity.

Martha