EXCESS

Small word, HUGE meaning!

I am dealing with "excess" in my life. Maybe it is common to reach the "September of our years" and see all the things we have accumulated over the years, all the things we no longer use, and all the things we have difficulty giving up, etc, etc, etc! And the key words are...ALL THE THINGS!

I am comfortable with my "stuff" even though it does not have a place. All the years (eleven plus) that we went south to Texas for the winter, my main entertainment was shopping at Wal-Mart on the way down and on the way home to Minnesota. You know, Wal-Marts are not created equal and they don't have the same things in every store. We would often spend the night in our bus in the parking lot and we would buy food there and I would look in the craft area, and find some in-store sales to take advazntage of. I used to buy paperbacks there too because they were cheaper.

Now all my stuff is a milestone around my neck which is NOT comfortable anymore, a source of stress for me, and most of the items are not easy to get rid of. I keep thinking they have value to someone if I could just get the items to whomever could use them. ARRRGH!

So that is the project for the next year or two...pare down, throw out, sort, give away, sell, and what ever it takes, I want to simplify my stuff. I have never been a minimalist. I've always been a 110% person who tries to do the best she can, to do it "correctly" (a little Martha Stewart in there with details), and maybe it is because I am the oldest, or maybe it is just because that is whom I am. I see value in everyone (I don't throw people out either) and everything.

I have a "collective" personality and maybe that comes under the heading of "addictive" and "complusive". I don't like to stop until I feel I have eveything I "need" and "want". These feelings take over and become a driving force in my thinking and usually I can't let go of thinking about something until I get it the way I want, or am forced to forget it or until I hit a brick wall in some way. Change is difficult for me and always has been. But if I am going to get to a simplier life style, I need to change my thinking processes, and try my best to become a minimalist. I know I can't do it alone, but God can give me the "desires of my heart" and give me the victory over my "stuff" I seek. Change is not going to happen overnight. It took years to collect all my treasures, and will take some time to get rid of the excess that I am not using. I pray I am succesful so that I don't leave a mess for my kids.